Sunday, November 27, 2011


I love when I read something that makes us look like good parents.  You know, like I've got it under control. Like I know what I'm doing.  In fact I may be a little smug about it. To myself anyway.

Like this article that discusses the fact that in a recent study, kids that ate margarine regularly had IQs that were lower by about 4 points than kids who ate butter.

Man, do we have this one in the bag.... Have you been paying attention? All we eat is real butter. And it's even organic.... I NEVER NEVER buy margarine..

I have saved my child 4 precious IQ points without even really trying.

A second after high fiving myself over this I rememembered that the main reason I only buy real butter is because my mom fed us margairne  my entire growing up.......

Friday, November 25, 2011

Unlikely Black Friday Shopping Trip

So last night, Thanksgiving evening, after my last guests, my friend Kristin and her daughter & my brother and sister-in-law had left, I sat down on the couch in front of the fire. Everyone else was asleep. I looked at the clock and yawned. My head hurt a little. 11:15 p.m. "I really should go to bed" I thought.

5 minutes later I got a text message "We are outside your house, come shoppping with us."

What? Really? No, I'm so not a Thanksgiving-night-Walmart-Shopper kind of gal.

So I opened the front door and there were 2 (one was already in bed) of my 3 SGS girls, blaring Beyonce, "Girls Who Rule The World" What woman could refuse that? Besides, I though, I really need some advil....

So off to my first (and maybe last) experience with Black Friday Shopping. It was a thinly controlled chaos when we got there. Andrea told us point blank NOT to get a cart, it would slow us down too much. Turns out she was right. She instructed us to get a map. We obeyed.  The item Cristina came for was gone already.  We all wanted one of the $40 wireless printers. Andrea staked out the spot, Cristina got the cart.

I had been looking into a laptop and they had one that was a really good price starting at midnight. I walked over to where they were and inquired what the procedure was. Apparently there are numbers that you get. They gave them all out at 10pm. They were gone.

Then next to me was an older man who said something like "hey come with me.." and I did. (Just over to the next aisle mind you...) he said. " We have an extra ticket and we've been waiting to give it to someone nice." Score! Cheap laptop back on!!

So I stood with the other people who were bitching and complaining about people cutting and about not getting in front of them. And telling other people THEY were rude... The man with the laptops kept telling everyone that if you had a ticket, that you WOULD get a computer. They apparently did not believe him because the bitching continued. 

At 12:05 a.m. I got the laptop and made my way to my friends who had fled the scene of people SWARMING the wireless printers.... (While nabbing 3 in the process.)

We moseyed through the crowd of people who didn't look to me like they had any business spending the amount of money that their carts represented. I tried not to think that. We chatted and shopped.

We waited in line forever. I was fading fast. I bought my advil. We pooled our cash for waters. We hurried through the scary parking lot.

I had such fun with those women last night. I crawled into bed at 2am. I was tired today and still had a headache. I remedied it with a walk in the woods with my husband.

But tonight all I can think of is what a special thing it is,  to have someone who likes you enough to remember to swing by your house to get you to go on a midnight shopping expedition. That's something awesome.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

A Quick Thought

The rest of you, quit your bitching!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Crushes Around The Internet- Dave Ramsey, The Bulletproof Executive, Zac Brown & Luke Bryan

I'm a woman with a lot of crushes. You don't have to be particularly good looking to qualify as long as I find you interesting and compelling.

Lately in the interesting and compelling category.

Dave Ramsey

The king of getting out of debt and paying with CASH! The man who made it possible for me to stay home with my daughter. (ok, that man would actually be my husband but Dave made me belive I could do it...)  I'm reading his new book, Entreleadership, and it's a good one. Same old no nonsense Dave Ramsey telling you how to run your business. I adore Dave and listen to his show almost every day ("It's about your life and your money," )  He keeps me on the financial straight and narrow (barring any smoked salmon emergencies.) He's a nice guy. The dumbest people will call up and you yourself would just wail on the stupidity of these people.  And he's patient and kind and tells them like it is without calling them a complete moron.  I just love me some Dave Ramsey. I listen so much even my daughter can identify his voice.... "The Same Advice Your Grandma Gave You, Only We Keep Our Teeth In."

Dave Asprey, The Bulletproof Executive.

Dave Asprey, is a Silicone Valley Nerd who's doing whatever he can to do just about everything better.... He has a blog, The Bulletproof Executive.   He sleeps less, eats better, performs better and probaly makes more money than you.....He's compelling... He's biohacking his life. Don't know what that is? I didn't either.  I'm not saying I'd do all of the things he's doing but you can't argue with his results.... He's recently introduced me to the joy that is Grass Fed Kerry Gold Irish Butter  (shh.... Don't Tell Dave Ramsey.) and dark chocolate. I sometimes imagine sitting around with him playing dual n-back brain training games and eating Kerry Gold Butter off his fingertips.

Zac Brown.

OMG you gotta love Zac Brown. His music makes me happy happy! Toes can make me chuckle almost any damn day although it's a little disconcerting when your 6 year old asks from the back seat,
"What's roll a big fat one mean?"
"Umm.... I don't know honey, la la la la"

 I find that beard compelling...

I'm not much for concerts or large crowds but if the Zac Brown Band comes anywhere near me. I'm going to be there, swinging my bra over my head.

Ok, I'll probably be wearing my bra but I'll certainly buy a racy one to wave over my head.....

And he doesn't like debt either!!  I think I love this guy. I 

I could knit that man a had and he'd like it.... And you can bet I'd use some hand-spun, hand-dyed expensive ass shit to do it....

Luke Bryan

My music OCD has taken over with Luke Bryan's new song "I Don't Want This Night To End."  I love that deep voice of his and I completely want to climb up on the dusty seat of his truck....I'm rocking this song in the car and at the gym...CONSTANTLY......

This video makes me realize I've never gone to a party in a truck before.... Add that to the bucket list.....

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Wegmans Smoked Salmon, Michael Buble, Guy Who Almost Hit Me Today & Increase Your Hottness

Here Are Some Things I'm Thinking About

Smoked Salmon 

Have I mentioned my love of smoked salmon (Lox, not the kind you get in a gift basket at Christmas from Hickory Farms)  I've always saved it for special occasions. But recently I noticed that Wegmans has their own brand  in their seafood section and being that Wegmans does everything pretty well, I thought I would just try it...You know, to see... For a special occasion. $7.50. What could be the harm. 3 Styles..... OMG...

Oh. My. God. I love this stuff. The quality is so good. It's an ideal breakfast for me because it's delicious, low in calories and has a lot of protein. But a $7.50 package is only 4 oz. I can eat that rather quickly. I've since graduated to the $14.99 package that is 12 oz. At 2 oz a day this would be 6 days worth. But I can eat that package in 5. (and that's only if I hide in in the depths of the fridge so my husband doesn't throw some on his eggs.)  That equates to $3 a day for breakfast. Which doesn't seem  THAT bad until you figure out that an egg is about $.17. I could easily make breakfast for under $1.

I may be overdoing it with the salmon anyway. My husband has mentioned the mercury in fish like this. And that he's afraid I'm going to start glowing in the dark.

Perhaps I'll drop back down to the $7.50 package.

Michael Buble
Does anyone besides me dislike Micheal Buble? Goodness, I can hear you all moaning as you read this with "Oh I LOVE Michael Buble." I know you do. And all of you think he's so darn adorable too. I just can't stomach him. To me, Michael Buble always sounds like he's miserable. Even when he's singing happy songs.... That voice grates on me so much that I don't even think he's cute. Go Home Already Michael Buble. (I realize I'm probably the only one who feels this way.)

To Guy In The Car Who Almost Hit Me Today
To the Guy in the car who pulled out and almost ran right into me because it was obviously very hard to see me in the large green Explorer in broad daylight. You completely deserved the bird I shot you. All I kept thinking was that you almost injured my child's mother... I'm not all that worried about my own mortality and all, but if you leave my kid without a mom because you are texting some dumb buddy of yours, I will be PISSED.

Go To The Gym, Increase Your Hotness.
Today marked the 16th time that I've done the weight circuit at the Y. Most visits I do the elliptical machine after too.  16 is not a milestone or anything (or even that many times) but I'm not a natural exerciser. You know what I find natural? Laying down around 3pm with a good book.  Wake me up at 5.  (not that I really get to do that anymore.... Much...)

Back in August 2 things happened in tandem that, alone, I'm not sure would have lit the fire under me to get me out of bed. 1) I turned 40 and 2) all 4 of our parents landed in the hospital with different ailments (some, completely preventable.) My parent's visit's were rather long. These things all combined to make a perfect storm for me. AKA, scaring the crap out of me....

But like I said, I'm not really a natural exerciser. So it's with some pride (and surprise) that I've gotten myself  there 2-3 times a week since August (The weights started a little later). And some days are harder than others. Which is why I'm mentioning this today. Today, in fact, I thought that getting myself in the car would be enough, but I still felt kind of sluggish about it. Once I got there, I farted around and went to the bathroom and weighed myself (like perhaps I could go home and get out of the whole deal  if it said something really awesome), I think I was 2 machines into the rotation before I came to terms with the fact that I was actually going to do the whole thing....

Even my husband, a natural exerciser, has days like this. And he had one last week, and was mentioning this to a female colleague of his, who gave him the sage advice "Go to the gym, increase your hotness."  And it worked, he went.. Now I don't know if she was using the term "your" to refer to my husband's overall hotness or just as a general term (I know what my husband would say.) but it seemed like a good mantra to adopt and a much easier one to get on board with than "Go to the Gym, Increase your Cardiovascular Heath." or "Do The Weight Machines Because You Are 40 And Should Probably Start Worrying About Bone Density."  And so tonight I'm a little hotter than this morning. And my bone density is probably looking up too.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Magic Pony Ghost In The House- Major FAIL

On Friday morning I went to parent visitation day at my daughter's school. It was also the day of the book fair.

Almost as soon as I arrived at my daughter's first grade classroom she started acting up. When one of her classmates hugged me she glared at them and said "That's not even YOUR MOM." She fidgeted, she whined.... I asked her teacher if she was always like this. (NO!) I chalked it up to the fact that perhaps I was a distraction so I told her to stop and ignored her antics. The teacher finally asked her if she was ok, to which she burst out crying that she didn't feel well and had a headache. After a quick trip to the nurse we determined that she had a 101 fever and that I should be up for mother of the year again...She was stricken that she was going to miss the book fair so we stopped on our way out the door.

Which explains how we came to possess Magic Pony, Ghost in The House. My girl REALLY REALLY wanted this book.  It didn't look all that promising to me, and I'm pretty sure my girl was sucked in by the overly precious and cheesy cover. (Look at THOSE HEARTS) So we went back and forth a little but I acquiesced in the interest of time &  because she was sick and bought the book for her as well as Judy Moody Girl Detective which I thought looked better and that my daughter didn't particularly want (What can I say, I grew up on Encyclopedia Brown....).

So we read Magic Pony, Ghost in The house this weekend. And let me tell you HOW MUCH THIS BOOK SUCKS.  The basic premise is that the main character has a poster with a pony that comes alive when she needs him. In this particular book she has to take care of another horse, who belongs to a  "friend" of hers. After she takes care of the animal she goes over to the girls house where the, "friend," a snotty rich girl and her friend make fun of and scare the main character. RATHER than rise above the situation, the main character comes back with the magic pony to scare the girls and give them "a taste of their own medicine." she even leaves the girl's house a mess in retaliation. SERIOUSLY. This is ALL that the book was about.  Oh yeah, she takes a ride on the horse after getting back at the snotty girl....

Who would write this crap for kids? And who on earth would publish this book. Not only was it poorly written, the message sucked.

I used the opportunity to have a "discussion" about the book.  I figured that maybe I could use this terrible book for good, and said "Oh my goodness, I can't believe she did that. What do YOU think she should  have done?" which garnered answers like "Tell an adult" and "Leave the mean girls house." Both fine answers, but I completely led the witness. We didn't have a "book discussion" I told her what to think... Later I justified this by telling myself that part of my job as a parent is instructing my child regarding how I think she should treat other people or deal with mean kids. (But we didn't have a book discussion....)

Just because books are for children they shouldn't be low quality. That book was High Fructose Corn Syrup for the mind. I almost want to write a one star review of this book on but there are no other reviews and I can't be that mean.

My daughter just spent the last week enthralled by the magic that is Anne Of Green Gables. Now THATS a wonderful  book for children. (For anyone really)  When Anne got her puffed sleeves (one of my favorite parts of the book) my daughter wore her Halloween costume over to her grandparents house because IT HAS PUFFED sleeves. Now that's a connection to literature. The realization that we are not alone, that we relate to characters, and situations and life. That is what reading is about. Those puffed sleeves. That is what I want my daughter to take away, not that it's ok to retaliate if someone treats us badly.

It's all good I suppose. Up until now, when we've read books together, it's been with the assumption that the author is good or just or  presenting a world view that we agree with. We've never tackled that sometimes books are poor quality or we don't agree with them or that the author's message just isn't a good one. I still don't think that's a lesson she quite gets at this point, being that we've never read a book with this poor a message before.

I want my $4.99 back!